Tuesday, 31 July 2018

While I was away



I don’t normally like exposing too much of myself and how I feel or think (my boyfriend would lol at this statement!) or at least not on the blog, which is open to everyone to read. I did however, take a two year hiatus from writing here and you know, things happen, life happens.

I am 26 now and not sure if I am allowed to say that I am “growing up” anymore but I guess I have been evolving into a more mature person who now accepts dinner conversations about mortgages and marriage and babies. So in the last two years certain things have dawned on me – and some of it is very subjective so feel free to disagree.

Trust your gut feeling

You know when you have that awkward gut feeling about a situation or a person and yet your mind disagrees with it? Your mind is an idiot, always trust your gut! Us women have a way of knowing things without verbal or visual confirmation of what is actually happening. It’s some form of a heightened sensitivity to all sorts of social situations or people, an ability to sniff out bullshit. I never used to take my gut feelings seriously but why wouldn’t you? At least be extra cautious for your own sake. If the gut feeling is indeed wrong (and it rarely is but it can happen) it will subside.

Leave work at work

Look, I work to live I don’t live to work. Yes, I do have crazy ambition and desire to be respected for what I do but in the end of the day, I don’t work in a business that I own or have any serious stake in and frankly, sometimes people are downright rude and difficult. I deserve some time away, cuddling my dogs and pestering my man to cook dinner.

And all that “first one in the office, last one to leave” corporate culture really bugs me too… because you know what – if you spend 12 hours at work every day instead of 8, it doesn’t make you a good employee, it just shows poor time management skills. You’re snowed in with too much work? Say something about it then, because it’s not fair for you to be burdened with 3-person workload. Simples!

No one owes you anything

You should be able to switch off but equally – if you don’t work for what you want to achieve, it’s just not going to happen. You are in charge of your career path and no one, I repeat NO ONE, will come to you and say: “Hey Boyana, you know that Photoshop course you’ve been dying to take? Here’s some money and 5 days off work, go do it!” or “Hey Boyana, there is a great job for you in my new team, why don’t you apply for it?” No one owes you that and no one will give you anything unless you ask for it – sometimes politely, other times more assertively. If you work in a decent company, there are normally decent opportunities around, take a look and see what will benefit you most.

Or if you actually don’t have a job and you’re stuck in a limbo of paths and options – just do your research! That’s my advice before you go into a company or industry. Do your research and stick to what you want to do 100%, no compromise – you will make it happen eventually. And if you’re unsure, try lots of things! You will figure it out even if you have to bust your bum to get it. That’s the advice I wish I had received 4 years ago when I graduated…

People will leave and that’s OK

Any One Tree Hill fans out there who remember Payton’s traffic light drawing saying people always leave? Ah, good old, slightly grim teenage years! But seriously… People do leave and that’s okay. Stick to your close people and you will be fine. And if they leave too then there was a reason and life goes on for everybody. Hindsight is an amazing thing and if it sucks now, you will later see how it was actually okay. This one is short and sweet, not much more to say.

I still have so many question marks hanging over my head daily – things like what and where is home , can a person be fully uprooted from one place and feel comfortable elsewhere, isn’t it all about the people really? And other questions, like whether it’s acceptable to have potatoes for dinner every single night. I imagine the answer to the latter one is no so I would like to say I am definitely not having potatoes for dinner every single night.

Is that remotely interesting for anyone to read? Who knows, it is therapeutic for me though.

Stay tuned, people. 


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